STIGIMA AND SUICIDE

It is extremely difficult to lose a loved one to suicide.

 And the intense pain can be exacerbated by the stigma that is associated with suicide.

 This stigma is rooted in ignorance. Most people do not know very much about suicide, and are hesitant to even talk about it.

 But the insensitive, ignorant, and cruel statements that suicide survivors are sometimes subjected to defy common sense and deeply outrage me.

 Ignorance is not an excuse.

Because of the stigma (the ignorant stigma, mind you) that still exists concerning mental illness, many people who need help do not seek it. Even though there is clear scientific data that indicates irrefutably that a physical connection exists with most mental disorders, many people still stigmatize others because they stupidly hold on to the misguided beliefs of yesteryear that people with mental disorders are weak or just lack will power.

So, again, many people who need help do not get it because of this ridicuous stigma. So they try to live their lives with untreated mental disorders, like depression.

Unfortunately, untreated mental disorders can lead to suicide.

So, what needs to be done? First, if you need treatment, get it now. It does not matter what stupid and ignorant people think, what matters is that you get help for yourself. Period. Do not allow ignorant people to cause you any more pain than you are now feeling. And remember, their ignorance and stupidity is their problem, not yours.

And remember that there are a lot of great people who are caring and compassionate (and definitely not ignorant!) that want to help you, if you just give them a chance. So, reach out for help.

So, if you or anyone that you know needs help, get help now.

Suicide survivors should be treated with the highest level of respect and sensitivity 100 percent of the time. And people should not need to be told that basic fact.

 But hurtful statements, unfortunately, are oftentimes made.

 The best thing to do after a suicide is to stay away from people that may be insensitive.

 And if anyone says anything offensive, get away from them as quickly as possible.

 Surround yourself with supportive friends and family members.

 Again, the best way to deal with the stigma, ignorance, and insensitivity immediately after a suicide is to stay far away from anyone or anything that would cause problems for you. Do not give people the chance to be insensitive.

 Later on, well after the shock wears off, and you are feeling better, you can work to reduce the stigma and confront ignorant people when they are insensitive about suicide -- but not until you are feeling stronger, and have worked through much of your grief.

 However, if someone does make an ignorant, insensitive, or hurtful statement to you -- at any time -- speak up. Let them know how you feel, then get away from the person as quickly as possible

Suicide is NOT a Selfish Act -
It is an Act of Desperation
by Someone in Intense Pain


The pejorative, disrespectful, and ignorant statements that we are assaulted with concerning suicide angels are in abundance…and are disquieting to cope with on a daily basis.

You’ve heard them many times, statements about suicide being “a sin,” “a crime,” “an act of self-murder,” etc. Well, let me address one more ignorant statement – that suicide is a “selfish” act.

WRONG.

Suicide is a desperate act by someone who is in intense pain and wants their pain to stop. That is a HUMAN response to extreme pain, not a selfish one. And over 90 percent of the people who die by suicide have a mental illness at the time of their death, so they are not thinking clearly.

Saying that a person who had severe clinical depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, PTSD, or a similar illness was engaging in an act of selfishness when they died by suicide – even though their thought process, mood, and judgment were greatly affected by their mental illness – is not only inaccurate, but downright cruel, to both the suicide angel and the suicide survivors.

And those who use the word “selfish” are merely helping perpetuate the STIGMA associated with suicide.

A suicidal action that manifests from intense, excruciating, unbearable pain associated with a serious mental illness has nothing to do with selfishness. Period.

 Suicide is not self-murder

Over 90 percent of the people who die by suicide have a mental illness at the time of their death. They die by suicide because they ARE NOT thinking clearly and are suffering from excruciating emotional pain.

And they feel that they MUST die by suicide to end their pain.

But there are many people who are IGNORANT about suicide and use the deeply offensive and patently INCORRECT term “self-murder” when they talk about suicide.

But murder is defined as “the unlawful killing of one human by another, especially with premeditated malice.” So, as any intelligent person can see, suicide unquestionably DOES NOT fit the definition for murder…at all.

The first problem with labeling suicide as “self-murder” is that it implies suicide is a crime. But suicide is NOT a crime. People who die by suicide are trying to stop their pain. There is NO criminal component to suicide. Period.

Next, the word “murder” implies a very evil intent to bring the most severe harm imaginable upon another person. But with suicide there is NO evil intent and NO desire to bring harm upon another person. Again, people who die by suicide want to stop their pain.

And “murder” means the killing of another person. But there is no other person killed in a suicide.

Contorting the word “murder” by placing the prefix “self” in front of it causes the new word “self-murder” to be a nonsensical, twisted term – a term that is oftentimes used by people with a NEGATIVE (and ignorant) agenda against people who die by suicide and against suicide survivors.

For example, those who claim that suicide is a sin will oftentimes state that those who die by suicide commit “self-murder.” Thus they try to advance their idiotic agenda by using the word “murder” as a WEAPON of hate...a weapon to denigrate and dishonor suicide angels and suicide survivors. But the individuals who advance this idiocy are only exhibiting their own IGNORANCE by making such statements.

Suicide is NOT a sin.

Suicide is NOT a crime.

And suicide is NOT self-murder.

Suicide is NOT an Act of Weakness;  and People Who Die by Suicide are Not Weak
 

Would anyone say that dying from cancer is an act of weakness? And that people who die from cancer are weak?

No.

Would anyone say that dying from heart disease is an act of weakness? And that people who die from heart disease are weak?

No.

Would anyone say that dying from a stroke is an act of weakness? And that people who die from a stroke are weak?

No.

Indeed, it would be idiotic to say that dying from cancer, heart disease, or a stroke is an act of “weakness.” Such an utterance would represent a level of unparalleled ignorance and insensitivity, to say the least.

Yet some people will say that suicide is an act of weakness and that people who die by suicide are weak – but this statement is as ignorant, insensitive, and incorrect as the statements about cancer, heart disease, and stroke.

Over 90 percent of the people who die by suicide have a mental illness at the time of their death and thus they are not thinking clearly, and they usually are experiencing excruciating emotional pain.

They are not weak; they are ill – just like people with cancer are ill. So the word “weakness” should never be uttered in association with suicide.

Clinical depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and other mental illnesses can cause people to do many things that they would never do if they were not ill, including die by suicide. So “weakness” has NOTHING to do with suicide.

Also, using an incorrect word like “weakness” perpetuates the strong stigma associated with suicide. And uttering such an ignorant word in association with suicide is extremely disrespectful and hurtful to suicide survivors.

Suicide is not an act of weakness; it is an act stemming from a serious mental illness, and the words we use in association with suicide should reflect that fact.

by Kevin Caruso

http://suicide.org